Struggling to agree on who is entitled to what following divorce but want to avoid contested divorce proceedings?

It is often hard for divorcing couples to come to an agreement as to the division of their assets, even if they have separated on good terms and are trying to come to an agreement amicably. In such personal matters, it is often hard to be objective and consider what a fair settlement would be, rather than just what you think you deserve.

It would be advisable to bear in mind the following factors when trying to reach an agreement, as these are the factors a judge will take into account should the matter proceed to court. They are a useful guide.

  1. Welfare of any children
  2. Income, earning capacity, property and resources of each person
  3. Financial needs, obligations and responsibilities of each person
  4. The standard of living enjoyed by the family prior to the breakdown of the marriage
  5. Age of the parties and duration of the marriage
  6. Any physical or mental disability
  7. Contributions made by each party to the welfare of the family e.g. caring for the children
  8. Conduct of the parties (but only where it is so bad that it would be unfair to ignore it)
  9. Any disadvantage to either party of ending the marriage

It is also important to remember things which are not relevant when it comes to finances. A judge won’t take into account who cheated on who or behaved badly during the marriage unless this directly relates to the finances. For example, if one party spent a large chunk of the marital pot on expensive gifts and hotel rooms for their bit on the side, a judge may find this relevant.

Even if you do manage to agree who gets what outside of a courtroom, it is always advisable to each seek independent legal advice and have your agreement recorded in a sealed court order so that both parties will be bound.

If you would like any advice on coming to an agreement with your ex, or assistance in drafting the agreement and submitting it to court, please contact Stephanie at

Kleyman and Co Solicitors. The full service law firm. Helping you get what’s yours.