Children are small terrorists! Don’t give in!
Today started very much like any other day. My son woke me up at 5:30 (even though it's the only day I didn't have to get up for work in 7 day) and demanded that I make him breakfast, even though at 10 years old he's more than capable of making it himself. He instructed me that he wanted cold pizza left over from last night, and two chocolate bars. Of course I complied.
Later on he wanted to watch two adult movies, and then go riding on his bike. The second part might sound ok, but we live near a main road, and he wouldn't let me supervise him, or wear a helmet. I did make him take his phone with him (the latest I phone 6, top of the range) but only so he could text his friends whilst he was on his bike, not for security reasons. When he got back he told me he wasn't going to return to school after the holidays, as he'd rather stay home and play on is computer all day, and I said that was fine.
Whether you know me or not, the chances are that when you read all of this, you knew that it wasn't serious. Whilst we might indulge our children from time to time, no self-respecting parent would allow their child to behave like this, and if they did, you can be certain that social services will have something to say about it.
Nevertheless, in child access disputes, the resident parent will sometimes try and persuade the non-resident parent that the child doesn't want to see them. As a parent, with extensive experience in family law, I can say from both personal and professional knowledge that children almost never don't want to see their parents. Sometimes there is some bad feeling, and sometimes there is something else that the child wants to do, but deep down they still love both of their parents and don't want to cut them out of their lives. I know this, parents know this, and Judges know this, but nevertheless, resident parents will still try and persuade their children that they don't want to see the absent parent.
Even if it is true, even if the child is reticent about seeing the absent parent, the resident parent needs to do the right thing. In the same way as you would disapprove of any parent who really allowed their son to behave in the way I outlined at the start of this blog, or a parent who didn't make a child have inoculations, or do their homework, you would disapprove of a parent who allowed a child to break a court order without a very good reason. For the record, “I don't want to”, is no better reason not to see a parent than it is not to do homework.
If you are a resident parent and you think your child may not want to see the absent parent, I can help you. If there are real grounds (and there are very rarely real grounds for a child not to see a parent, but it does occasionally happen) I will help you oppose the order. If there are no real grounds, I can recommend child counsellors who can help your offspring. If you are the absent parent and your ex is using this unconvincing excuse not to let you see your children, despite a court order giving you access I can help you enforce it. Drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org, and we can talk about how to get kids to eat their veg as well.
Kleyman & Co Solicitors. The full service law firm. We don't take no for an answer.